Alan Stevens is an acclaimed International Profiling and Communications Specialist renowned for his ability to read human behaviour and uncover hidden patterns of manipulation. With over 30 years of experience, Alan has worked with law enforcement, teachers, therapists, and families to decode how coercive control operates under the radar. He developed the Rapid Trait Profiling system, a groundbreaking method for identifying subtle red flags in personal and professional relationships. Alan’s insights help survivors and professionals recognize abusive behaviours early—before they escalate. He is passionate about educating the public on coercive control, a silent form of abuse that erodes freedom and self-worth. Alan’s practical tools support individuals in reclaiming confidence and rebuilding trust in themselves after trauma. His work has been featured internationally, and he continues to lead with compassion, clarity, and powerful knowledge that saves lives.

How do you recognise abuse when there are no physical signs?

In this powerful episode of the Healing Through Love Podcast, we speak with internationally respected Profiling and Communications Specialist, Alan Stevens, on the deeply misunderstood and often overlooked form of abuse—coercive control.

Unlike physical violence, coercive control is silent and stealthy. It shows up as financial manipulation, social isolation, obsessive monitoring, and constant criticism. It erodes self-esteem, isolates victims, and often lays the foundation for more visible violence. As Alan reveals, it’s one of the most dangerous predictors of future harm—and yet one of the least discussed.

Alan shares practical tools from his Rapid Trait Profiling system to help you identify red flags in behaviour and communication, giving you the power to make informed decisions and escape manipulative patterns. With real-world examples and compassionate advice, this episode brings clarity to a dark and confusing experience many face.

Whether you’re recovering from emotional abuse, supporting someone who is, or simply want to become more aware, this conversation will empower you with knowledge, confidence, and hope.

📣 Tune in, reflect, and share this episode. Awareness saves lives.

🧠 3 Key Takeaways:

1. Coercive control is often invisible but devastating—learn how to spot it early.
2. Profiling behaviour can reveal red flags that help prevent future abuse.
3. Rebuilding self-trust and independence is possible with the right tools.

Introduction to Alan Stevens

• Alan Stevens is introduced as an international profiling and communication specialist with decades of experience in understanding human behaviour.
• Alan has worked with law enforcement, educators, and families to decode patterns of manipulation and control.
• Alan is the editor and creator of the Rapid Trial Profiling System. 

Alan Stevens’ Background and Motivation

• Alan’s interest in profiling and reading people stems from personal experiences, including two divorces, broken relationships, and business partners who mismanaged finances.
• Alan’s goal is to help others build and maintain safe and strong relationships. 

Facial Features and Personality Traits

• Alan discusses the significance of facial features in determining personality traits.
• A mono brow is associated with being methodical and resistant to change.
• A thin upper lip indicates concise speech, while a fuller upper lip suggests a tendency to embellish stories.
• Alan examines a combination of traits, including eye shapes, to determine personality characteristics such as loyalty, secretiveness, and vengefulness. 

Coercive Control and Abuse

• Alan explains how coercive control operates through charm, isolation, and abuse, using the acronym CIA.
• He emphasizes the importance of recognizing when someone’s behaviour does not align with their personality traits as a warning sign.
• Alan discusses how survivors of abuse may exhibit body language and facial expressions that attract abusers. 

Self-Esteem and Attraction

• Alan highlights the importance of self-esteem in attracting healthy relationships.
• He notes that individuals with low self-esteem may unconsciously attract abusive partners.
• Alan advises working on self-esteem to attract positive and supportive relationships. 

Nonverbal Communication and Gut Feelings

• Alan discusses the significance of nonverbal communication, such as body language and micro expressions, in detecting incongruence.
• He explains that gut feelings often arise from picking up nonverbal cues that something is amiss.
• Alan emphasizes the importance of trusting one’s instincts when something feels off, even if it cannot be immediately explained. 

Mirroring and Matching in Communication

• Alan differentiates between mirroring and matching in nonverbal communication.
• Mirroring involves imitating someone’s actions on the opposite side, while matching involves replicating the same actions.
• He explains how speakers use mirroring to influence audience responses and how individuals may use mirroring and matching deliberately to manipulate others. 

Final Words of Wisdom

• Alan advises against relying on a single indicator to make judgments about someone’s character or intentions.
• He encourages looking for clusters of traits, context, and congruence to form a more accurate assessment.
• Alan uses the metaphor of ‘getting all your ducks in a row’ to emphasize the importance of considering multiple factors before drawing conclusions.

• Alan Stevens, an international profiling and communication specialist, discusses his work in understanding human behaviour and identifying patterns of manipulation and control.
• Alan Stevens shares his personal journey into profiling, driven by two divorces, broken relationships, and business betrayals, aiming to help others build and maintain safe relationships.
• Alan Stevens explains how facial features, such as the mono brow and thin upper lip, can indicate personality traits and communication styles, emphasizing the importance of understanding these traits for better interpersonal interactions.
• Alan Stevens discusses the connection between facial features and personality traits, including introversion, extroversion, and ambiversion, and how these can be used to build stronger, more effective relationships.
• Alan Stevens explains how facial features and body language can indicate psychological dysfunction and coercive control, emphasizing the importance of recognizing these signs to protect oneself from abuse.
• Alan Stevens discusses the concept of mirroring and matching in body language, explaining how these techniques are used by speakers and manipulators to influence others, and how to recognize when someone is being groomed.
• Alan Stevens advises listeners to look for clusters of indicators rather than relying on a single sign when assessing someone’s behaviour, using the metaphor of ‘getting all your ducks in a row’ to emphasize the importance of congruence in observations.